Ahem. Cough. Sheepish smile. Nervous laughter. Another smile. Uh, hello there!
Excuse me – I am a tad bit nervous. It seems that I am still, after all these years, suffering from a bit of stage fright. You see, I am relatively new to this whole “blogging” concept (writing, not reading), and I am worried that I won’t live up to your expectations.
I don’t even know you (mostly or yet), and you don’t know me! Why do I care so much?
I suppose you could call it desire – desire to be known, to be accepted, to be loved in spite of flaws. Here are some of the flaws you’ll encounter in my blogs (just to save you the time of figuring it out on your own):
- I have a penchant for perfectionism, and I always fall short ( I DO have a perfect record there). And, you know what? I just realized (duh!) that perfectionism is based in the sin of pride. And we all know that’s deadly. Please forgive me.
- I have a lot of ideas, but don’t always know how to express them in a clear, logical way. What I write may make sense sometimes and … seem pretty dang random at other times. Please forgive me.
- I don’t have a lot of so-called “spare time” to write. I may post and then not, not, not … where did she go? for a while. Please forgive me.
- I am not a theologian. I don’t speak with the authority of the Church, but as one of its pew-sitting members. I’m one of those frightening people with an opinion and a computer but no credentials. Please forgive me.
- I have been walking the “politically correct” balance beam for far too long. With some formalized training /work as a journalist and a professional career balancing diametrically opposed corporate needs versus the needs of employees, I didn’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings. That’s not necessarily a bad thing, but if I don’t stand for something, as the saying goes, I’ll fall for anything. Now that I’m standing for something, I need to remember to speak the truth in love. If I offend or alternatively don’t seem to have a spine, please forgive me.
- I apologize too much. See #1-5.
- Did I mention I’m a failed perfectionist? So here is #7, so we at least have the number of perfection going for us.
So, without further ado, I will just … start … writing. Come what may. I pray that I glorify God in what I write. That perhaps someone else might learn something or grow from it. But most especially, I pray that what I write will, in some way, draw me closer to Him who made me – crazy idiosyncratic flaws ‘n’ all.
Before I end this post, I recall the words my Mom wrote in a song lo these many years ago:
Just be yourself and no one else
Let God express Himself to you in how He made you
For no one else can do it quite the same as you do!