So, funny story – this post about order that you’re reading right now – is about as out of order as it can be. First it was going to be the post for day 4 of this 31-day sojourn. Then it was forgotten and became day 23. Then something else happened and it got bumped to yesterday. Annnd then it got bumped again.
Sorry, Order. You just haven’t been that important to me – I’ve taken you for granted for years. Especially in the past. I saw very little need for you. I’ve kind of pushed you around, using you for my own gain only when I felt it necessary.
As a woefully busy wife and mother with an embarrassing amount of things on my “to do” list, you’d think I would have gotten my act together, and all my household chores and ministerial obligations would be systematically honed and scheduled and executed like clockwork.
Excuse me while I laugh my freaking face off.
Because everything does not run like clockwork around here – not even close – and I am sorry to say that, while there are seven people with free will running around in the house, much of the reason things are not orderly is because of my faults and failings. The crux of the responsibility falls squarely on my shoulders.
I could rhapsodize about all the problems I’ve had with Order (and its immediate family members Scheduling and Deadlines and Cleanliness) – all the baggage, as it were – that led me to this place. And, perhaps, it would make me feel better to get those things off my chest, and perhaps it would cause you, dear reader, to empathize or have pity upon me in my plight. You know the one thing enumerating it all wouldn’t do? It wouldn’t get a dang thing done better, more quickly, or with fewer meltdowns. So, I will save that drama for another time. Perhaps.
Today, Order, I see you. For this moment, in this space and time, I truly do.
There’s value in you, Order – dare I say, possibly, even joy – that I’m starting to welcome as time marches on and the baggage seems less significant as the to do lists and tasks and calendaring items seem more so.
I’m learning, however slowly, that having things in order – at least, as much as I am able – can free up more space to do things I want to do rather than, as I’ve long thought, would squelch my creativity. In that freedom, friends, I’m finding some unexpected joy.
Inconceivable, I know, but true. One routine tweak, one to do list, one tidying up session at a time.
Until tomorrow, y’all – praying for your peace of mind and a sprinkling of joy.